Lived Experience Forum

[Fop]

I have just been given a letter from my employer that I am considered terminated, unable to return to work there, medically unfit they say. I have been off work with an approved claim for CPTSD from the workplace for 2 years. On one hand it is a relief, I know I couldn't go back. I am struggling a bit though with the loss of identity and purpose that work brings me. I wonder what work I might find when I can work again. I have a good team of a doctor, psychologist and psychiatrist saying that I am not ready yet- and I know I'm not because I'm still very emotional and angry. I'm 63 years old and feel a bit of panic when I think what all this means for my future, especially financially.

Anyone else been in this situation?

[D1ng0]

Hey @Fop, welcome to the forums. I'm glad you've got a good team supporting you. I haven't been in your situation, but I have heard lots of people discussing that retirement or an inability to work, even without mental illness or trauma being involved, can cause lots of negative feelings. So, you're definitely not alone, and I hope some other folks will comment with similar experiences.

[Snowie]

Hi @Fop 

I am on work cover at the moment. I suffer from CPTSD too.

I am classed as medically unfit to work at this stage. Some days I think to myself that I couldn't go to work in the state I am in at the moment. Other days I think what will my future hold. I can't keep going like this for the rest of my life.

I can understand the loss of identity. I don't really know who I am at this stage of my life. 

I would like to be retrained and go back to work in some capacity, but when this will be I really don't know.

[chibam]

Hi @Fop . Welcome to the forums! 🙂👋

I can relate a bit to your predicament. I had lots of trouble trying to get work through my therapists, and eventually they just told me that there was no hope of me ever having a career (or anything else good, for that matter).

It sounds a bit differant in your case because you agree with them that you aren't ready to work yet. But I can still understand how distressing it must be, worrying about your outlook for the future.

Have your therapists considered how your concerns about your future might be contributing to your being "emotional and angry"?

[MayaBird07]

Hi @Fop 

I can relate to you situation, I have been off work for 18months on income protection and while my employment hasn't been terminated, I know I can never return to work there.

Since I have been of work, I have felt the same loss of identity and purpose. It definitely made it difficult to get out of bed some days as it just felt pointless. 

Could you do something that you could work towards. I've thrown myself into study for the last few months and it has been a game changer in how I am feeling. Also learning Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) has helped me get better control over my mindset while I am not working. I just did a free 10 week version with Anglicare (its usually a year) but it was good to have something to attend each week for 10 weeks, it helped me slow down and focus more on myself and my recovery instead of feeling like I 'Should' be at work. 

Anger is a hard emotion to deal with and It is great that you have a mental health team taking care of you.

I found the time in between appointments the most difficult, the day to day of life. That is where I begin to stress about my future and things like money as its hard to see a way out when it feels like the rug has been pulled from beneath you. 

Learning skills to slow down and be more present, may not have cured my situation or any of my financial issues, but it has helped me accept my reality for now, I keep reminding myself that this is a temporary discomfort. I am just taking things one day at a time, thinking too far forward makes me anxious, so just making small daily goals has been helpful in keeping me calm and motivated to get up in the morning. 

I hope things improve for you and you find some peace in this difficult time. 🙂

[tyme]

Hey @Fop ,

I can see this is a very difficult time for you, especially as you consider your future and your financial stability. 

I can see there are quite a few others who can relate to what you have shared. 

It's so important to look after your mental health and wellbeing.

We hope to hear from you soon.

tyme

[Minkie-Rose]

Hi @Fop 

Thank you very much for reaching out - you are an obviously intelligent person, who is understandably challenged by an imposed change in your personal circumstances.

Having recently accepted a voluntary redundancy from the NSW Public Sector, I understand how a transition from full-time employment to your current situation is causing you unrest. Notwithstanding, I know that this feeling will pass as you come to recognise your broader human worth and all that you have achieved to date.

In terms of transition strategies, and while acknowledging that your circumstances are different to my own, I managed my period of transition by undertaking higher education studies, which, on completion, will auger me well for future employment. Moreover, the studies have provided me with an opportunity for social interaction, and have helped to maintain my mental acuity. 

Another action that has been equally helpful, was to contact a financial advisor for some preliminary advice on where my partner and I stood financially. This pro bono advice was provided by a financial advisor with my superannuation fund, and provided me with the requisite knowledge to work through any financial concerns. 

Beyond this suggestion, I have every confidence that following a well-deserved break you will secure employment. In this regard, and with a career counselling hat placed firmly on head, I would encourage you to follow your interests. I say this, as interest, rather than prestige or remuneration, is proven to be one of the most sustaining influences in people's career choice and enjoyment. 

Lastly, I am hearing that your team of helping practioners have your absolute best interests at heart. This includes taking the time to mentally and physically reset, and to fully consider the range of opportunities that are available to you as you enter another stage of life.