Feeling conflicted

[NameUnknown]

Hi all
So was told by my psych that i need to learn emotional intelligence and learn to express instead of hide what i feel but ive been told my entire life that im too emotional and an attention seeker even by my own mother so personally i find it easier to hide what i feel but lately i feel on edge and its getting harder to keep it together

[Shaz51]

Hello @NameUnknown 

sharing does help you

my husband has had MI all hi life an he comes from a family who are quiet and negative and they don`t talk much

as for me I come from a family that talks lots about everything , if you want to be heard you needed to talk lots and loud

over the years my husband has been able to speak more , only to me though

so we are here for you my friend , soo express yourself here safely ad freely

soo how is your day going today ??

[Former-Member]

Hi @NameUnknown and @Shaz51 🙂

@NameUnknown it sounds like you are being encouraged to look at things through a lens which hasn't been something familair for you beofre. Change can be difficult to do especially when it has had a consequnce before. I wonder if this is something you might be able to practise with members here on the forum? Giving yourself permission to respond authetically and honestly. It might be as simple of letting someone know how you really are instead of jsut saying good thanks, or it could be giving voice to something that you would usually keep silent. What do you think? 

If you were you able to explore things in a little more detail with your psych do you think that might become a little more accepting of the changes they are wanting you to make? 

Pebbles 🙂

[NameUnknown]

Hi @Shaz51 and @Former-Member

Thanks for responding, i know that change is hard ive already had to make changes to get where i am today and they are not easy changes to make. The reason this particular change is challenging because because for me its more undoing a change i made when i was 9 to make life easier. I use to let my emotions out naturally until my mother noticed it took attention away from her never ending "problems" so she started to tell people that i was an attention seeker and it was all a put on so people would go back to poor her so i taught myself to not let the negative emotions show to hide it and pretend to be happy but its gotten to the point that ill have a major breakdown about every 2-3 years and well i suppose im about due as i can feel the build. It didnt occur to me when i was younger that the negative emotions need a release valve or the pressure builds. But now my pysch thinks that instead of making a release to reverse the change i made when i was younger and at the moment im not sure its going to happen but i have been trying i just cant seem to do it. Me and my psych have talked alot about why it got like this but i suppose thats more the easy bit
Anyway i feel i am raveling on now

My day has been okay @Shaz51 mostly same routine