Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[PinkFlamingo]

Aw, thanks for the hugs @Shaz51 🤗🌺

Thanks for sharing some of your story, and Im really sorry you have to battle on with complicated health issues 💜. It's sometimes really hard to get on with things when we aren't as well as we want to be, isn't it?

Youre resilience is inspiring 🌺

[tyme]

You're such a battler @Shaz51 🙂

[Sharni-lea]

The last days have been rough, my partner seems to choose to do things that I tell her I'm not okay with, then gets annoyed when I say I'm hurt, she says sorry and acts like it then should be okay, and goes all depressive saying this is why I'm too good for her, because she always seems to hurt me no matter how much she tries not to.... leaves me so confused as I was clear about my needs and she chose the make Althea opposite choice then acts like she's always messing up and can't stop. Awaiting diagnosis but bpd and adhd anxiety and depression have been mentioned.

[Pem]

Hi,

I majorly new to this. 

I'm about a 3/10...really not feeling good. 

My bf of 2 years broke up with me and I found out my mum has cancer. Found out both lots of news in past 2 weeks. I'm constantly crying and feeling lonely and lost. 

I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression 4 years ago and this news had brought on a downer for me. 

I just want someone to chat to but I hate complaining. 

[Shaz51]

Hello @Sharni-lea , @Pem 

Here for you 

@tyme , @PinkFlamingo , @Tilz , @Xibon 

[Healandlove]

@PinkFlamingo , I'm sorry for the delayed reply. It has been a very busy couple of weeks with work and family. Today I went to the shops and had a very good scream inside the car without anyone around to let out the anger, anxiety, stress, everything! I have also been trying to find some time at the end of the day to read. I love live books! 💕 

Thank you for the book title. Sounds wonderful! I'm so inspired and glad you found your calling in helping others.

Will you learn about EMDR in your course?

I hope you are taking regular breaks from studying and also finding time with friends. 

Sometimes I imagine having tea with you and @Shaz51, @tyme and @TideisTurning and sharing stories and laughter.  It is a nice visual help for me when I feel like everything is too much. 

I say it often, this community means the world to me. 

Thank you for everything you all do for us all.

Hope you have a good rest tonight. 

Also I need to go back and read your posts about your kidney health.  So lovely that you wanted to donate a kidney. Did you end up donating to someone else?

Hugs to you lovely friend 🧡 🫂

[Healandlove]

@Shaz51 , how did your mum go with her procedure? 

How is MrShaz now? Are you both back at work. Hope you got some rest and downtime in the end.

You are very strong! Sounds like medically you have been through a lot.  I hope you are also looking after yourself lovely friend 🧡. 

Have a good night 🫂 hugs xx

[PinkFlamingo]

Hey there @Sharni-lea 🌺

I’m really sorry to read how uncertain things sound with regards to discussing boundaries with your partner - it sounds disheartening, confusing, and compounding 💜

I wonder if this is helpful.. I was in a relationship where I never really knew where I stood, and despite trying to clarify boundaries, there was frequently an issue where a previously discussed and agreed boundary was stretched or broken, however the discussion to resolve the issue was always very difficult and ended up emotional because it was around perceptions instead of staying on topic. 
The thing I learned was that the only thing I can control is my own reactions, participation, and engagement - I had no control over my partner or what they said, I only had control of how it affected me and how I reacted 🙂🌺

This gave me back some autonomy, and self-worth, while facing these challenges. 
I thought I’d mention it so you can have a little window into how I tried to keep myself emotionally safer while trying to sort through the relationship issues 💜🙂🌺

Hopefully it helps? Even if not, I hope it is some solace knowing you’re not alone and I hope things can get better for you 🫂🌺

[PinkFlamingo]

Hello there @Pem 🌺

I’m so sorry to hear about what you’re going through - you’ve had very big and emotionally impactful changes happening in your life, it makes so much sense that you’d feel upset, tearful, lonely, lost, and depressed 💜🫂 

Gently, what you’re going through is so hard to manage on your own, and moreover, you shouldn’t have to…this isn’t complaining, ok? 🙂💜

Feel free to chat here - and tag us using the ‘@‘ symbol anytime 💜🙂🌺

I’m PinkFlamingo, a Peer Guide Volunteer 🦩🌺💜

@Xibon 

@Shaz51 

[PinkFlamingo]

Hey there @Healandlove 💜🌺🫂

Aw, it’s always lovely to read your replies Healandlove - never worry about the timing of when you can write them 🙂🌺

With such a busy time with work and family, a little bit of vocal pressure release when alone is never a bad thing 💜🌺🙂

I hope reading at the end of the day is a nice wind-down ☺️

I’ve been getting stuck into study reading - who knew text books could be so interesting? 🤭🌺

I think we learn about EMDR a bit, but in my particular course we won’t be learning how to conduct EMDR as a therapy modality, I’m pretty sure..I think that’s learned as an additional certification… however, you’ve got me curious, so I might ask the teachers and see what they say 🌺🙂

Thank you for the kind reminder to have breaks - I’m trying to make sure I have them 🫂🙂

Thats such a lovely image, having tea together with  @Shaz51 @tyme @TideisTurning , sharing stories and laughter! ☺️🌺

It’s really heartening to know it brings you some comfort when things are getting a little much 💜🙂🫂🌺

It’s a pleasure to sit with you on the forum Healandlove, you bring so much genuine care with your kind words and gentle consideration 💜🙂🌺🫂

I didn’t end up donating a kidney..they noticed some blood markers of a bone marrow problem not long after that, which meant I came off the donor list immediately, and was cancelled off the Red Cross blood donor list also - I’m barred from any form of donation now, due to the risk of bone marrow mutant cells transferring to someone else 😞🌺..so, I guess in a way, it was a good thing that I didn’t donate that kidney, because it may have had some bad rogue cells in it which could hurt someone, and they’d need to have a bone marrow transplant to fix it 💜

I went on high dose immunosuppressant therapy 

+ IV steroids, then an immunomodulator to try to stop it, but unfortunately it didn’t work.
I would’ve given liver and kidney, but this silly problem happened to come up 🙂🌺

not to worry - we can only do what we can do ☺️

I hope you rest well and get some good sleep, and you’d week goes well ☺️🫂💜🙂🌺