I am completely done for the night. A mistake was made. I was sent an email to say a post had been removed when in fact it hadn't. Seriously? I mean, seriously? Granted, another post was removed and I don't actually think that one was disrespectful either but I am too completely traumatized to care.
I feel terrified. I feel like I'm right back at the church and reliving that whole nightmare of twenty-two years ago. I feel sick. If anyone was to sit down and think "hmmmm how can we do maximum harm to Phoenix_Rising", they would come up with something akin to what has been unfolding over the past three months and no doubt will continue to unfold for some time to come.
I'm not at all sure about this idea of looking to you guys for support in place of the guys at the HC. I get the sense that even the past 24 hours have taken its toll on many of you. I have been living this nightmare for the past THREE MONTHS. My brain is utterly broken.
Thank you for caring - even if some of what you say is unhelpful. I understand that you are trying to help while flying blind. I wish with all my heart that I could share the details with you, but alas, it's a secret. Shhhhhhh don't tell!
Night (for the second time).
