Not sure what to do !!!

[greenpea]

@Shaz51  my early morning walk was beautiful :). could see the stars and the moon plus the lights on the bay. Very special. I wen't later and it was a slog as it was quite hot but am determined to shed the weight so off I trotted sweating and huffing but did the 1 hour lap. So am exhausted but happy with that.

You must be very fit Shaz51 with all your cleaning and work that you do for your mum. 

[Shaz51]

way to go my super @greenpea 

it is raining soo hard all day here

[outlander]

Oh @Shaz51  your poor ankle. It looks very painful! Try to rest ,ice and elevate as much as possible

[Shaz51]

ammm back to plan A, as my aunty has reduced her help @outlander , @greenpea , @Owlunar , @Jacques , @Appleblossom , @Former-Member 

the intransition team wants to get mum from the wheelie walker to a walking stick

mum wants to stay with the walker as she said she feels safer with it

I agree , told mum today if she wants to stay and is happy just using the walker I am happy too

[Former-Member]

My mum is not a walking stick type person either @Shaz51 . As far as I know she has only ever used a walker.  

[Former-Member]

i agree too @Shaz51 . I cannot understand why the transition team are insisting on moving your mum from walker to stick. Doesnt seem to make any sense.

So sorry your Aunt has taken a step back from things. 

Perhaps time to start pushing for more outside help again. There is only so much you can do Shaz, before you are putting your own wellbeing in jeopardy, and your mum's safety at risk.

Please do not allow your very admirable sense of duty, or your obvious love and devotion for your mum, to cloud your common sense here.

Thinking of you, and concerned for you.

Sherry 💕💕

[greenpea]

@Shaz51  Hi Shaz51 I agree with everyone here if your mum is happy with the wheelie walker why force a change on her. Sticks can be hard to use (my mum never got the hang of it ) so why pressure her into using it. 

[Owlunar]

Aw @Shaz51 

This has to be so hard - I know why they are trying to get your Mum to walk with her stick - they are testing things to see how she goes and I wonder about it - but if she wants to use her walker - she is 82 or something similar - what's the big deal? - I guess they are encouraging her independence

So maybe this gives you your chance to tell your Mum she needs more help that you can give right now - a hip replacement is a huge operation - this has been a shock to your mother's system and she's failing a bit - and it seems she hasn't really got an idea of what she can and can't do anymore but needing to use the walker is the perfect time to tell her she needs outside help and you can be there for her emotionally needs if you are not looking after her house-maintenance

Aw - I know - there are times when my carers really get under my skin - some of them are fantastic - other's do the strangest things - I can really understand your mother wanting your to do things like that for her because you know what's important but your own health isn't the best and you sound really exhausted sometimes

And you have Mr Shaz to care for as well - I notice he tends to drop his bundle a bit when your Mum needs stuff - 

You are stuck in the middle - you want the best for your Mum at this time of transition - I missed a couple of days on your thread - a lot happens on your other thread but humanly speaking - we can't do everything for another person - it will stretch and stretch us and we end up saying "No" eventually or go under ourselves

I get it Shaz - it's a very hard time for you

Dec

The weight of the world - so heavy

[Appleblossom]

@Shaz51 

Its always extra difficult to work out the right thing for others.  How much coaxing is good and can help and how much might be detrimental ... will differ for each individual.

SO very many people around 80 use walkers.  Last week a lady at the zoo brought hers and managed well over rough ground and walking tracks.  Its more important to keep moving than be on a stick.  My mother was a stick lady she was proud and would never be on a walker, but she did not have the issue your mum has either.  Tbh I think there are medical reasons to keep using the walker after a recent hip replacement and   A stick encourages lob sided movement as the weight is not evenly distributed.  Independance with a portable seat is worth a lot ...

Take Care of you among all the presures.

Hugz

[Bea]

I don't know you or your Mum, but I've met many people after a fall - hip repair/replacemebt. People are different & have different health & recover differently. Some are quite fine to go home, but others may admit they have been struggling for a while. Hospital-rehab-home is not a bad plan but it may be useful to look into the memory side of things to get a realistic picture. When home, keep the conversation going. Is there a home care package? Would staying at home with more help be possible?

This sounds like it has been a scary fast turn into "old age street" for you both. Hopefully you will now get time to slow down,, look at the scenery & decide where to go next.